Thursday, October 06, 2005

54 and counting

Haven’t been regular and I just realized that saying I am busy sounds like a loser. All of us have the same number of hours in a day. Therefore, I am going to gossip on this page.

This time it is about a guy. He is from one of the best Management Schools with a very successful career. What I am trying to say is he has got brains and let’s assumes he is a very nice person too. This guy went through the process of wife-hunting. He saw 54 girls. Here, by ‘saw’ I don’t mean just scanning through the snaps. ‘Saw’ as in going to the girls’ house or meeting her and trying to know her, scaling her with certain yardsticks. Very much like the serial Mr. Yogi played by the late Mohan Gokhle. The serial had a better ending as he went for someone who helped him one day without expecting anything back from him.

Perhaps, this guy got the inspiration from someone who said we often get the best if we insist on it but forgot to define what is meant by ‘the best’ according to him. He married the 49th girl and divorced her after 2 years. If he is happily single today, I have no comments but I pity this lost soul as his mission-wife failed terribly and if he decides to remain single, he is going to die without knowing one of the best joys of human bonding. He had even started writing a book on it.

Marriage, for that matter the Indian Marriage is still considered the best institution in the world. No matter how absurd it sounds, arranged marriage works pretty well. It is ok in chasing the illusion called perfection but before he goes through the ordeal, ‘Once bitten, twice shy’ or even ‘twice bitten never shy’, I wish to tell this highly educated moron not to flunk life (I don’t think those 54 girls must be just anybody. People do see the backgrounds both educational and social before approaching each other if it is an arrange marriage.) but to first know what he wants in a woman or even to believe in second chances. It is ok to expect but learn to give a little more and realize that even the so so oooh aah starlets do the boobs or the nose job.

Title suggested by Hemanshu.

21 comments:

Hemanshu said...

54 girls is insane! I think the more you see, the more picky you become because the first few influence or sharpen the qualities you are looking for.

So by the 54th you will simply never find the kind of girl you are looking for because your filters are so specific!!

Anbu said...

Instead of looking for a perfect gal, he should have looked for compatible gal. Nobody in this earth is perfect and its wrong to expect that.

A successful marriage has a compatibility factor between two.
Social and edu backgrounds are good measures of it. and hence indian marriages work most of the times.

There is always some compromise involved in successful marriage. and successful ppl rarely compromise. Guess its one reason for the divorce here.

sathya said...

hi arunima,
hey this seeing a girl thing... i hope i finish it in max 3 attempts...(when my time comes)

author by the brook said...

hahah I havent been able to blog too.. how are you doing

Marriage is a beautiful phase if you know how to handle it..

Pallavi

noodles said...

u cant expect to find a picture perfect better-half.. lowering ur expectations and compromises are musts in an arranged marriage (which is perhaps why arranged marriages in india work)..
as for this guy in particular, its better to leave him alone lest he sud make his life (and someone else's) a living hell.. perhaps he has a mind of his own no one has cared to delve into..
hopefully, serendipity sud save him..

Mr. Maverick said...

54 girls!

unbelievable!

Anat said...

let him see 2 more girls and then ur post title can be "Ab takk chhappan"!

tony said...

marriage is all about compromise like many people already said. You walk half your mile, i walk my half and meet somewhere midway. Otherwise, it would end up lik ethe saying,"all my life i was waiting for my perfect women but when I met her she was also looking for her perfect men". What guarantee that you will be the perfect person for your perfect person :-)
I had an ex who wanted me walk the whole mile coz she was, as she said," I have been like this all my life".How glad I am that she is an ex now.
And i believe compromise doesn't mean change. It should rather mean adjusting, because you can't change someone who has already lived more than 20 years. Try to Change at your own peril

Boldnbeautiful said...

lol May be more than Wife he may be interested in Samosa, Kachori, Jalebi, Jamun.. All the stuff they serve while the guy make a Visit to Girl's place for Seeing formality..

In Case if he had accepted one among 54 then he would have missed all these Samosa, Kachori he he he

claytonia vices said...

I wonder if there is category for world's pickiest groom or something like that in the Guinnes book...

zypsy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
zypsy said...

you search, you chase, you compromise, you demand..it never ever ends. love, marriage..it's so unpredictable. similarities? differences? there are no rules at all, nothing right or wrong anymore. i've loved a woman who's totally opposite to me, a woman who's a mirror-image to me...now, i've given up, i'll just wait. if 'it' happens i'll be blessed, if it doesn't, i'll leave everything and join a monastry one fine day. it's not a joke, this monastry thing has been a recurring thought for so long...i wonder if...

Anonymous said...

Besides everything, I do believe marriages are made in heaven!!!

Handa said...

i will marry the first one who agrees to marry me. i very strongly doubt tht such good things happen more than once.

Stone said...

Marriage is a beautiful-institution, I'm sure the guy who started this thing must a genius!!!!

AmitL said...

Hi,Arunima...yes,it's ridiculous..54 girls,is of course,a bit too much.And,imagine the humiliation for the families of each of these girls and the girls themselves.It's high time that the system changed.In fact,I wouldn't be averse to the idea of girls going to see boys,someday in the future.Let both parties have an equal say,instead of a one-sided yes or no.

Jas said...

Absolutely ridiculous!!! BTW did he celebrate when he completed half a century....

Invincible said...

54 girls .. oh my !!
does he find a mention in Guiness Book .. ok at least in Limca book?

Apart from being nice, is he 'seek perfection in everything' guy ?

shobz said...

marriage is beautiful. only when you want it to be. listen to your heart closely. it tells you who the right person is, when he walks your way. that's what my heart did. and i'm happy i heard its sqeaks of joy.

sinusoidally said...

I actually sympathize with the guy. He must not be ready at this time in his life to give it another chance. C'mon, he just got divorced for crying out loud.

AmitKen said...

if the number is 54, then there is something wrong with the guy. (is he really a 'guy'???) I mean c'mmon, 54 girls refused to marry him!!! and the one who actually married him, eventually divorced him and corrected a mistake :))

I am sure he'll have a century to his credit soon :D