Monday, December 05, 2011

honey, where is the sofa?

My long distance marriage has been going on for almost a year now. Before that, S travelled for a couple of months. He came back and was asked to travel again when we just shifted to the new place. He said 'no' as i was not well and we were winding up the interiors and monitoring the wood work day in a day out. His tickets were booked the next time around, but i met with the accident just two days before his travel due date and he had to postpone again until i could stand on my feet. i had become very popular with his management and clients alike. However, he did go and it has been almost a year now. Time for us to take stock of things and decide what we want to do. P.V Narasimha Rao, i think, had famously said in his book, " the decision not to take a decision is also a decision." Well, i lived this for a year and it was never an easy thing. No doubt, he never looked happy in any of the pics that i saw of him on T.V while he was the P.M.

When i went for the two months vacation, i didn't know S wanted me to weigh the options and see for myself how i liked the U.S and if we would wish to stay there, or want him to come back. Emotional as i am, i never expected myself to love my job so much. i tried being a house wife for the two months, burnt my fingers while cooking, cribbed and cried and made sure S take over as the official cook, and came back. i am pampered silly by my husband and i am surprised that i can still stay away from him. Anyway, confused mind leads to confused post and this is not going to end in a proper way. Instead, i will share what i did while coming back to india. Without asking him, i packed the lava lamp, brought it to India, forgot about the voltage difference and the moment i inserted it on the plug point, the power tripped and darkness prevailed. It was nice and pretty in his apartment. Now, it is wasted and repairing it doesn't list even in my to-do list. i also carried candles, picture frames, and a lot of stuff for the house. S did tease me saying that if i could, i would have packed the sofa too in my suitcase, which is actually true.

Coming back to the U.S, it was not possible not to be bewildered the first time i saw the country. Most of my friends, and half the world have already travelled or are settled there, so i did not shout it out loud. It was mind blowing at times. I did travel a lot. The most thrilling experience was the south-rim walk at the Grand Canyon, where we stood small and admired mother nature in her vastness, mystery, and beauty. Vegas was amazing too, and i lived every moment to the fullest in the brightest spot on earth. Rest, i flew up and down meeting up with childhood friends and family. The icing on the cake was the business class from Atlanta to Paris on my return journey. i had been crying until i reached Atlanta for leaving my hubby behind, but i cheered up when i saw that i was getting business class in an economy ticket.

Why am i writing all these only now when i had actually come back in the end of August? This is how i live through my separation from the hubby, re-living each moment we had together as if it happened just today morning. The months have somehow passed and we are trying to be together again.

8 comments:

kirti said...

hi arunima,
oh darling you are missing yr hubby , now is it any consolation that I am also surviving a long distance marriage for almost 8 months now? so it makes two of us .Things are pretty much same here except 'pampering and spoiling silly part'. ;)
Yeah , at times it is so damn tough . specially taking decisions singlehendedly (although at times the decision making becomes so easy and quick for the same reason).

wishing you a reunion soon .

Arunima said...

@kirti: I like that part about decision becoming quick for the same reason. :-)

Meenakshy said...

Yes, that country in mind blowing for sure. But if you dont have a car and job (in the same sequence), it is pretty much a posh village. We have better commuting facilities in our villages. Rest apart, I am sure you will get a job there. Just that deciding on waiting for that much of period depends upon you.. there is nothing like being together irrespective of fights and all that

AmitL said...

Hi Arunima,good luck at taking a decision and, the decision working out for the best.Take it from me- I stayed in Dubai for 10 yrs, away from the family..except for 1 yr when they were there...till, finally I decided- enough!And, am back in Baroda since Oct.:)It's mainly a question of one's priorities, more than anything else, I'd say...money,family, security....

austere said...

Good luck on your decision, whatever you decide.

Pallavi said...

Home is what you make of it and with whom.. at the end of the day... Hugssss :)

phatichar said...

:)

claytonia vices said...

If there is nothing to relive, life would be so damn boring. :)