Saturday, March 17, 2007

(un)comfortably numb

The lane was lonely and I walked with my mouth covered with my hands. Suddenly a car stopped beside me and I was shit scared. How would I scream if they try to misbehave? Why the hell did I wear a sleeveless top today? Nothing happened, I walked pass the car and then I see a group of guys standing and looking at me and I get the same fear again, damn insecure.

I am on local anesthesia and I cannot open my lips. Rather, I should say I cannot close them though I can bite my teeth. I feel that both my cheeks, my nose and my lips are swollen though the mirror shows all signs of normalcy.

I write this post with this numbness while Bangalore is busy banging its head to Iron Maiden. I got four of my pre-molars extracted. We have only 4 pre-molars right? In that case from today, I am a pre-molarless lady. Along with my teeth, the dentist also successfully extracted a lot of money. I may end up spending close to 30 k on my teeth, some of which are manufacturing defects, some which happened while growing up. (No, I don't smoke or chew pan).

Coming back to the point, the dentist has inserted bandage on my teeth which I am currently biting. I am advised to eat ice-cream after half an hour, eat the pain killer and eat curd rice for dinner. I am not supposed to spit but swallow. I tried doing that, and it felt as though I am sucking water from a cloth. So, I let it be. I try to wipe myself off and I see blood dripping from my mouth though with a thin consistency. Every now and then, I have been pushing it out through the bandage with my tongue instead of swallowing.

I made the dentist write an alternative pain killer just in case I don't get the first one. It must have looked really odd to the pharmacist, bandage between my teeth and speaking without opening my mouth. Managed to get the curd and ice-cream in the same way. The curd guy was really sweet. He knew I couldn't talk and we managed with little words and more of sign language.

Well, I am going to wear braces. You thought I have teeth like Tinu Anand? nah, it was just slightly prominent like Angelina Jolie's. (murder me Angelina!)

The last time J and I had been to the dentist, she had advised me against it saying I don't actually need it. I was seeing someone too and he also had felt the same way. J has been married for more than a year. The relationship did not work either. I have gone ahead with my life and life has revealed a new story each time. I had promised my parents that I would be married by early next year. This procedure may postpone it to the next year and this time, I don't care about any deadlines.

My immediate concern though, is handling my job. My profile includes writing and meeting a lot of people and giving presentations during induction and trainings. Yes, I have to push PPts down the throat of a lot of unsuspecting souls. I don't know how it is gong to be. One of my friends had scanty hair and she said that a lot of people would speak to her head and not her- their eyes unconsciously going to that part of her anatomy where nature has been unfair to. I don't want people talking to my braces.

Anyway, what I wanted to share was my compassion for those people who are disabled. I can understand how it must be to be paralyzed? With just my mouth numb, I felt very insecure even to walk in a known lane. I salute my team mate R. He is on a wheelchair and he is the most technically sound in the team. He has trained all of us on many tools and has been our source of inspiration.

The numbness on the lower lip has slightly subsided now. You guys take care as I say,"give me life, give me pain, give me myself again"

20 comments:

akash said...

Please take care. Can't say much but just take care. :)

Get well soon.

Kishore said...

Get well soon.. You need to, so you can push the PPTs into their heads soon. Wishes for both!

Will the pre-moloars grow again?

Arunima said...

thanks!

@kishore: I am afraid, they won't. I am already regretting it. Going through a lot of pain. I am on a liquid diet right now.

Stone said...

thats scarry.....!!
Don't worry abt ppts,anyways nothing bothers abt them during inductions etc.

Look at the bright side, eat lots of ice creams :-)

Take care of urself!!!

kaush said...

hey! Hopped on here somehow while I was blog hopping going from link to link ending up here. Read the first part and then down to teeth! Being in the dental profession myself I HAD to finish it and now feel compelled to comment!

Loved reading the post......actually we have eight premolars! So you are not completely premolarless :-) You just got rid of 4 to make space :-) Well it can be quite hard to talk with braces on but I do hope you make it through :-)

Take care!

burf said...

2 things:-

1 - there is this herb, very much like tulsi, it works wonders with teeth. 3 months back when doctor suggested me something i dint like i started chewing 3-4 leaves of it daily once a day till my teeth were well washed with the juices for 3 weeks. i still wonder where has all those issues with my teeth gone now.

2 - did you do that parachute gig alone?

Arunima said...

@burf: please get me the name of the herb. I am not able to chew anything after the extraction.

I went along with my ex colleague and her siblings.

chandni said...

get well soon girl...

and i really liked the thought u ended ur post with.

this too shall pass!!

:)

Nautilus said...

Join the club Arunima...I got 4 premolar extracted about 3 years back...its rough! Couldn't eat anything for weeks!! On the brighter side, I lost a lot of weight :-)

Hope you're feeling better!

Arunima said...

@nautilus: I don't have any more weight to lose. Quite thin already. Maybe,I'll do the vanishing act. :-)

pravin said...

sounds really scary and eww!

|| sbk || said...

Eeee...I've always hated my trips to the dentist for this reason...hope you feel better soon.cheers!

Prat said...

The physically challenged and the not so physically challenged (invisible disabilities) lead very very tough lives in India.
Very.

Anyway, I am sure you will sail through (or jump through, keeping the last post in mind) the experience. Please scream as loudly as possible at the dentists'. It helps.

@nu$h@ said...

Been there done that...
Hmm... it is gonna hurt a lot, and by the time you get used the hurt from one visit, it would time for the next...

Hope you have an interesting dentist who engages you in small talk alteast to divert your attention while he weaves the wires...!!!

Gud luc to you girl !!!

claytonia vices said...

Phew! I am so relieved to know you don't chew pan! That question was really nagging me for sometime now! ;-)

Get well and get smiling soon...

claytonia vices said...

Actually, I am worried about your weight. You won't need parasailing, a kite will do! :-(

GuNs said...

Aaah, best of luck with the painkillers. You would feel a little odd later when you are eating and you dont feel your premolars !

-PeAcE
--wiTh
---GuNs

Aqua said...

oooh i can empathize...i have BAAAD teeth so end up paying a small fortune to the dentist every year. he infact calls me his "gold mine" :)

take care. hope y're feeling better now!

Mamta said...

Hi Arunima, I hope u r doing good by now..just saw ur blog..i also wanted to get my teeth cleaned the basic cleaning n i went to dentist they gave me a list of things to be done(charges $3000)..i am so scraed..i didn't go back yet..and m brushing n flossing my teeth twice daily..after reading ur blog its more difficult to take a decision..:-(

plush said...

:)..ooh i love dentists...they owe me one for all my weight...n my obession with ice cream!its ok aru...u take care n keep hogging...hope u get bttr with those ppts without ur premolars...